Todays thoughts have been on my mind for a long time now. I've sat down to write this post several times within the last several months, even more so within the last several weeks, but something has always stopped me. I didn't know if it would be too much information to share, too personal, and it very well may be; but then I remembered part of the reason I started writing these posts was to help me open up and be a little vulnerable. SO here goes...
My brother graduated from Marine Boot Camp in Paris Island, South Carolina when I was fifteen-years-old. I remember being so impressed with the graduation ceremony and the sense of pride from all the new Marines and their friends and family was just overwhelming. I remember saying to my family that I was going to do it too. I was going to be a Marine.
I will never be a Marine.
My family got to know my brother's recruiter fairly well, so when he came to my high school later on that year, I decided to talk to him about my interest in the Corp. Thats when he told me that it would be impossible for me to be a Marine because of my heart murmur. I wouldn't go as far to say that I was devastated, but I was disappointed. I couldn't be a Marine, but the desire to join the military never left me. I ended up going to college for Secondary English Education and immediately got a job after graduating college and have been teaching for the past three years. However, around October of last year, the desire to join the military hit me again full force. I discussed it with Joe and we started looking into different branches of the military and possible careers but didn't tell anyone about it. In December, Joe and I travelled up to Virginia and spent some time with my Grandma and Great-Grandma. I love talking to them. My great-grandma is a wealth of information, knowledge and incredible stories. As we were wrapping up our visit, my great-grandma looked at me and told me to live life with no regrets. She told me to pursue any dream I ever had even if it seems a little bit scary. I found the timing of her advice slightly ironic considering what my current thought process was towards the military. As Joe and I continued traveling north to Pennsylvania for Christmas, we decided I would once again pursue my desire to have a military career.
As soon as we returned home from visiting family, I immediately met with an Air Force recruiter. It took a couple weeks to see if I qualified to even be looked at by an officer recruiter. I finally got the word that everything looked good, except for my heart murmur. I was told that if I got a clearance from a civilian doctor that I was able to do extreme physical activity than I would be able to pursue the career in the Air Force and meet with the officer recruiter. I did get the clearance and was told to begin studying for the AFOQT (Air Force Officer Qualifying Test). I wasn't scheduled to take the test until late March of this year. I've never studied so hard for a test before in my life. As my test date was looming near, I got a phone call from my recruiter saying that he was PCSing and I would have to wait to continue until the new recruiter arrived...in two months.
When I finally met with the officer recruiter, things didn't exactly go as planned. I told him that I wanted to be a special investigations officer and he basically told me the chances of getting that job were slim to none. He could get me in immediately if I took a flight job, but I just didn't feel right taking any of those jobs. That day, I walked away from a career in the Air Force. While my name is still out there, the possibility of getting the job that I want is high unlikely.
I got all this information recently- around mid June. I had already quit my job as a teacher, hoping that I would have been gone for boot camp over the summer or in the early fall. Obviously this is not happening, so I was stuck. What do I do now? Joe and I decided to take this opportunity for me to go back to school. SO, three weeks ago I started school for Professional Photography. If all goes to plan (which it never seems to) I will be done with school by next fall. My plan then is to start doing some freelance photography. I'd love to take pictures for magazines and travel the world doing so. The ultimate goal that I'm holding for myself is to get one of my photos into National Geographic. While I never thought that photography would be easy, I'm learning that it is a lot more difficult than I had anticipated. So for the next year, I will being diving head first into learning the profession of photography.
All that goes to say, a lot of changes have happened in my life that I hadn't really anticipated. I hadn't planned on not teaching, I hadn't planned on the Air Force not working out, and I hadn't planned on going to school for photography. But considering Joe's deployment is getting closer (only two months away now), I feel as though I'm exactly where I should be. I'm learning a new craft which I enjoy and it will be a good distraction while Joe is gone. So if anyone knows of a good place to shoot some pictures, or is willing to be a model for some of my shoots I'm going to have to do for school or has any advice- I'm all ears!
